Well, I had a dog and his name was Spot. It wasn't really; assuredly was not. But where ever he went; over here over there; he'd spot the rug like he didn't care. I just kept thinking, "He'll grow out of it." But he never did; his name should be... Twit. He got older and older and bigger and bigger and so did the spots; and I try to frame a way out of this most terrible thing, it can't be that hard, to do housebreaking.
He was a good dog; amiable as can be but whenever he had the urge to pee he didn't care where he was or when; something got squirted and squirted again. It was the same thing with number two; he humped right up and started to poo. I'd holler "Stop" but what a mistake now it needed cleaned up with a rake; cause off he would go running from me leaving a trail of poopy and pee. You might be amused with this writing of rhyme but if he does this deed one more time; he would be finding for elsewhere to stay; and I'd get a cat; litter box and some clay.
Nose Hair Clipper
I tried everything I could think of to train him; one day I would yell; next day I would brain him. I tried piddle pads but that didn't work and yelling at him made me feel like a jerk. He was a good dog don't get me wrong but in the house he didn't belong. Still there's no way to put him outside; I'll housebreak him yet; I tried and I tried.
I'm about to give up; frustrated you bet; but then I thought, "I'll research the net". assuredly I'll find on the web some resources; you'll find everything; I'll find training courses. But mark my words this is the end; he'll have to go; I'll lose a friend. Enough of those thoughts I'll be optimistic; I'm sure that I'll find training tricks realistic; that will bring a quick end to this question of ours and clean up my house; it don't smell like flowers.
There was lots of advice; some good and some bad; some I had tried some others were sad; one recommend to, "Rub his nose in it" I didn't try it and he thanked me for it. Someone else website said it might be his diet; to feed him meat only; my vet said. "Don't try it." I happened upon a good one next day; I read all their stuff then I went away with some free facts on animal training; my dog would get good and I'd stop complaining about all the things that made me go crazy; my dog wasn't stupid; my dog wasn't lazy. So I hurried back and read more of course; I had to do something he poops like a horse. But now he is pooping and peeing outside; success at long last but man what a ride. The training guidance and the methods and teaching was all I would need and now I'm not reaching for that pooper scooper or rag and bleach cleaner; and my dog don't think that I'm meaner and meaner.
He learned to go to the potty outside, "Hey, that's my dog!" as my heart swelled with pride. I trained him myself I told all my friends and this is almost where our story ends. Remember although you are not a dog trainer to take my advice, can you say, "No-brainer?" just get on the web, there's noteworthy stuff. You'll find the tools, there's more than Enough to solve your dogs problems anything they be. Thank you for laughing and listening to me.
Housebreaking Your Dog - A Whimsical Look